Emotions around emigrating

You may have heard me mention move2NZ.com, a very helpful forum for everyone who's thinking about/in the middle of/completed emigration to NZ. It's a friendly, resourceful, helpful site.

Recently Mike, who co-runs the forum plus the organisation Move2NZ, started a thread about the emotions of emigrating. (You may need to sign-up before reading it or posting, but it's free and well worth it.) I think this thread is great, as for me it used to be way too easy to gloss over what I was feeling, in favour of doing something. "Well there's a lot of stuff to do when emigrating", I hear some of you say. Indeed there is, and don't remind me, I should be doing it right now! But it's really amazing to me how much emotions control what I do, leading to my conclusion that if I don't know how I'm feeling, how do I know my actions and decisions are sound? And how can I know when hidden emotions are getting in the way of what I truly want to do?

EMOTIONS FROM A-Z
I experience a whole range of emotions at the thought of emigrating: certainty; excitement; anticipation; uncertainty; puzzlement; fear; sadness; guilt; terror.

I now allow myself to feel them (even tho it can feel uncomfortable); to unpick them; and to do what i can to assuage/augment them (depending on whether they feel unpleasant or pleasant).

LEAVING PEOPLE BEHIND
Both of mine, and my boyfriend's families, and also our friends, have expressed sadness that we're going. Some people were able to bravely express sadness, whereas others responded in anger, some do both.

I have some guilt over what they're feeling, but I keep remembering that this is my one and only life and I have a right to live it; if I stay here out of guilt I'll be resentful; and most importantly, that while I am responsible to others, I'm not  responsible for them.

THE WHAT-IF SYNDROME
I have 2am rushes of anxiety at the thought of emigrating: what if it all goes wrong; what if I hate it; what if NZ hates me; what if person X gets sick; what if NZIS revoke our visas; what if, what if, what if; arrrggh!

Years ago I learnt from a very wise book called Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, that fear isn't a signal not to do something - it's a signal that I'm stepping outside of my comfort zone.

So...if i really want to emigrate to NZ - and I really, really do - I have to live with the feelings of fear, and just carry on with my plans.

MOVING FORWARD
On the plus side, I love all the mental pictures I'm creating of my future: me, my boyfriend and our cats; sat together on a swing-seat; on the porch of the NZ house we're going to live in. My home-based business is doing well; my boyfriend loves his new job; the cats are all healthy; the sun is shining; we're really happy we made the move. The fear feelings are in my head - and stomach - so I'm replacing them with happy & excited feelings, which also live in my head and stomach.

Two books which are really helping me with this are Gulp! (helped me uncover hidden feelings which were sabotaging me when I tried to act) and The Secret (good for reminding me that focus + thinking of the good side + taking action = the happy results that I want).

What do you feel - do you have a range of emotions about emigrating?